|
from Dr Diana Carroll, Celebrant. 
Wedding Vows – For richer and for poorer, in Tim Tams and Happy Socks! The Wedding Vows are always a highlight of the Ceremony. There are two types of Wedding Vows, formal and personal. The first is the formal vow as required by law. The wording for this is set down by the Marriage Act and can’t really be changed. For this, you say “I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, Jane Eliza Smith, take you John David Jones, to be my lawfully wedded husband.” And John says the same in reverse “I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, John David Jones, take you Jane Eliza Smith, to be my lawfully wedded Wife.” You can change husband and wife to partner or spouse if you prefer and same sex couples can choose to be both husband and husband, wife and wife, or spouse and spouse. Apart from some very minor adjustments, you must say this formal vow to make your wedding legal and your Celebrant is not allowed to change it. In fact, changing it may make your marriage invalid. Many couples also choose to say personal vows in the wedding ceremony. These are your own, personal vows and can be anything you want to say to each other. They can be serious, romantic, or just funny. Some couples make deep and meaningful promises about their future together; other couples vow to always let their partner have the last Tim Tam in the packet! The key is that your personal vows are meaningful to you and authentic to who you are as individuals and as a couple. So don’t just google “wedding vows” and copy and paste what you find; write something from the heart that is personal to you. I always suggest my couples begin with three thoughts: What do I love about this person? What do I believe about our life together? What do I promise for our future? If you think about these three things you will have all you need for your personal vows: “I love you because…”, “I believe…”, and “I promise…” really helps you focus on what you want to say at the heart of your wedding ceremony. If you already have children, this can be a good moment to mention them in the Ceremony by making promises about your life as a family. I always encourage my couples to keep their vows secret from each other until the day because it is extra special if you hear them for the first time during the Ceremony and makes for a very romantic moment. I do recommend that my couples chat about the approximate length of the vows and the general tone so they have a balance. Some couples prefer to write shared vows that they work on together and make as a promise or pledge during the Ceremony. This can be said by both of you together, or can be read by the Celebrant on your behalf, such as: “John and Jane have asked me to share this personal pledge with you all: On this our wedding day, we promise to…” Remember that everyone at the wedding will hear your vows, so don’t say anything too personal or embarrassing! And you will probably be nervous, so don’t give yourself anything too long and complicated to say. A few well-chosen words from the heart is all you need. Leave anything lengthy for the speeches at the Reception! The personal vows are your moment to make a wedding pledge to your loved one and share that with your family and friends. Make it something special, personal, and romantic! With very best wishes for a wonderful wedding! Diana, xx As your Celebrant, I will guide you through the wedding. I am calm, relaxed, and happy! Call me on 0419 829 667 or email diana@bestweddingcelebrant.com.au 
|